The Right Friends

Today, I’d like to talk about a certain kind of ‘friend’ whom I think we are all probably familiar with. Well, familiar with certain attributes, I suppose – Certain faults, to put it more frankly. Sometimes, we believe too much in the belief that having a friend is always better than having an enemy. It can’t be denied that there is truth in that, of course. However, this belief sometimes causes us to go too out of our way to keep a friend when the alternative would not only be easier, but also incredibly self-beneficial. Not every friend is worth keeping – Yes, it’s never a bad thing to have some contacts in this world. However, there are just some times when you simply just have to let go.

This friend that I’m (personally) talking about is one whom we all find a little too hard to let go. A friend like this is usually fun, adventurous and fascinating. They go through life with an almost infectious, overly carefree kind of demeanor – and it can sometimes feel like they just simply haven’t got a single care in the world. It’s probably hard not to be drawn to them, especially because being with them presses an escape from so many comfort zones and helps to distract from those big problems for just a little while. However, just like their own problems, these ‘friends’ will quickly lose any interest in you as a person. They will often inconvenience you, they will often let you down, and they will seldom be apologetic over anything they have done. They often possess a narcissistic nature, and they unconsciously (or otherwise) make others feel inadequate or less important than they are. Furthermore, I am led to believe from experience that they would also probably never hesitate about ‘stabbing you in the back’ when they feel like doing so would benefit them in some way. Like me, you might know all about these traits they possess, and if so, you probably pretend not to see them, or you even try to overlook them completely.

Holding on to this friendship might seem natural – it might even seem like the only thing you should do. It might be argued that this friend probably has a back-story of his own – maybe it just isn’t right to penalize them for what they have become. But I’d like to break it to you right now – you can just never count on them where it counts. Is that really the kind of friend we should keep around? You might continuously tolerate how they take advantage of you and disregard your feelings, but soon this may result in negative consequences and self-harming anger that would otherwise be easy to avoid.

Sometimes, there’s simply nothing you can do but let go. You may feel like you are giving up on something good, like you are almost giving up a part of you that makes you a better person. However, I personally believe that once all ties have been severed with this friend, there can only be a sense of relief and positivity in the end. Yes, there will initially be some regret, and yes, there will be sadness, but holding on to something that will inevitably hurt you is like willingly throwing yourself onto the train tracks. Don’t ever lose sight of yourself – you can still be whatever you want even without their ‘help’. Find friends who will support you and let you take some of the credit you deserve once in a while. You don’t have to sever all your ties with a bad seed, but you should never label them as your priorities either. Sometimes, all that does is hold you back from something greater.

I realize that this article is probably a little more personal than any of my other articles. So I guess you can take it from me – giving up on a friend may seem like the hardest and stupidest thing you could do, but sometimes you have to take out the weeds before the flowers can grow stronger. I hope that I haven’t bored you or offended you in any way. Please share with my any thoughts you might have at OrdinarySGKid@hotmail.com or at @NatKathXo. J

Thank you so much for your time, dear reader!

And as a promise, here are some pictures of me and some of my friends whom have helped me realize the difference between a good friend and a lousy one. Here are a few of my Right Friends, and I hope that you have some of your own too!

Shout out to Janey :)

Shout out to Sam, brilliant actor. Catch him in his play, The Visit!

"SPasm"

Promised Mention: Beautiful Dezzy in the middle

Potawatomi (Hope I spelled that right).

Will always love you guys.

Pretty girls and Qisheng!

Cycling expedition at Ubin!

Credits: All of these beautiful people. And spongbob.wikia.com

Beautiful Singapore

Can you see our Merlion?

Before I start with this article, I’d like to first apologize for not releasing new stories as quickly I should be lately. The school term has just started again and I’ve been taking some time to get used to it. Please bear with me, dear reader! I promise to give my very best to always release new articles as soon as I am able to J

Well, on to business:

So, in my previous article I basically discussed reasons why some of our youths may feel the need to leave Singapore. Well, in typically predictable fashion, I’d like to take this time now to talk to you more about why we should all really consider staying in Singapore.

Okay, so maybe I won’t start off with actually staying here in Singapore. However, there are always a couple of reasons why Singapore would make a great place to visit.

Firstly, the food! Sometimes, it can feel like Singapore is simply the food capital of the world. Besides some of our famous local dishes (chili crab, anyone?), it is also possible to get a taste of practically every other cuisine under the sun. We have food that can fit any palette of tastes, but for a really authentic taste of our local fare, there’s just no better place to try something mind-blowing than at one of our local hawker centers. A large variety of different food stalls offering incredibly affordable prices – what more could we ask for?

Our Chili Crab- One of my favorite dishes!

Secondly, one thing that’s especially unique about Singapore would be our climate. It’s not that big a deal to have only one season – there are a variety of other places that share such a trait. However, Singapore is just a place where nearly everyday is expected to be hot, hot, hot! Maybe the novelty of such weather may wear off after a while, but there’s no denying that a change from what we’re used to is always fascinating (just like how we locals so enjoy the cooler climate in places like Australia – or is that just me?). Whatever it is, the Singapore weather can almost always be counted on to provide anybody with a nice, strong tan.

Lastly, there’s just no denying that more and more wonderful tourists attractions have been constructed of late. We have the Singapore Flyer for one, the Gardens by the Bay – we even have Universal Studios Theme Park on our very own Sentosa Island! If that’s not enough, we can always offer up our famous shopping district, Orchard Road, or our unique Esplanade Theatres – need I go on?

Our Esplanade - Some locals think that it looks like a durian

Well, now that I’ve covered some good reasons why tourists can expect a good (or, at least, interesting) time here in Singapore, I’d like to go on to talk more about why we locals should appreciate our privilege of citizenship here in Singapore.

Firstly, I’d like to talk about our education system here. Yes, it’s strict, but that makes it all the more efficient and sought after. Our degrees and diplomas are mostly internationally recognized, and great pains have been taken to ensure that our students here have some of the strongest foundations. Furthermore, it’s also compulsory here for students to taken on a mothertongue language. This allows us to connect better with our own culture, and helps us to communicate and get along with other cultures as well.

Racial Harmony Day in Schools

That brings me on to my second point, which is the fact that Singapore is one of the World’s most racially harmonious countries. With such a diverse group of people living together on one island, there is a sense of uniqueness and creativity that just couldn’t be found somewhere else. We even have a special day set aside to honor our racial bonds with each other – Racial Harmony day!

Thirdly, one thing that I’m proud of is the high level of security we have living in Singapore. People are more or less comfortable with walking the streets at night, and our shops are usually open till late to accommodate such night crowds. Yes, it can’t be said that we are totally void of any crimes or danger, but we do have a law that prohibits any use of weapons or dangerous items throughout the island.

Fourthly, we’d have to consider the economy here in Singapore. Singapore may be small, but economically-wise, it’s one of the best countries in the world. For example, BBC once released an article with the title “Singapore ‘best country in which to run a business’” (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-11671839), and a survey showcased on Yahoo reveals that Singapore is the best country for wealthy expats, and is “fast becoming an all-round expat destination for career progression, financial rewards and quality of life." (http://sg.news.yahoo.com/singapore-best-country-wealthy-expats-says-survey-104616713--sector.html)

Lastly, I’d like to discuss the validity of some of our stricter laws here in Singapore. Yes, some laws like littering fines or a ban on the handling of gum may sound silly at first, but there’s no denying just how clean Singapore is as a whole. I say: if these laws have contributed to maintaining the pristine condition this country is in, then these laws have been established for a pretty good reason. Of course, this isn’t always a case, but maybe lightening up on our many laws is just the way to go.

 Okay, so that concludes this particular article about our beautiful island- Singapore! I hope that I haven’t offended you, and I look forward to any ideas you might want to share! Simply email me at OrdinarySGKid@hotmail.com or follow me at @NatKathXo to send me your own opinions. I look forward to anything that you have to say!

Thank you for your time! J

Credits: Articles - BBC, Yahoo. Pictures- First: photographyside.com Second: streetdirectory.com Third: infocommclub.vs.moe.edu.sg Fourth: janicelim96.blogspot.com

The Migration Bug

Singapore Airport, Terminal 3

I have a lot of friends who tell me that they would like to migrate to somewhere different. Their preferred locations can be Australia, Korea, or the USA – however, the one thing that these friends of mine share is their deep conviction or yearning to make this a reality. This really makes me think – why do they all share this need to move on to something different? I admit that the thought has crossed my mind once or twice. Yes, I love Singapore, and I’m not actually going to leave it. However, it was probably fortunate that I’d given this a little more thought than necessary because it enabled me to come up with a handful of plausible reasons.

Firstly, consider the pace of life here in Singapore. It can almost be said to be too fast-paced, and this alone probably does not really appeal to many. Of course, there’s no denying that there are many other places in the world that have equally fast-paced economies (New York, anybody?). However, it can sometimes feel like work is the single most prominent and important part of living in Singapore. We go through a strict education system since childhood, and then we simply grow older and move on to working life. Conventional ideas – dreams like travelling the world – aren’t even allowed consideration. We either work our feet into the ground to keep up and stay ahead or we are likely to just drop out of the game altogether. Yes, there’s no doubt that the severity of this enables us to constantly evolve and improve as a whole, but soon it can feel just a little too harsh or mundane. It is probably from this realization that the yearning to ‘get out while we still can’ starts to transpire.

New York Palace

Next, let’s talk about the high cost of living. Yes, Singaporeans really do earn a lot more than average. We even have the highest projected GDP per capita! However, with the rather astronomical price of living here in Singapore, we hardly enjoy much of that luxury. This might be expected and maybe even reasonable, but it can be frustrating nonetheless. What’s the point of working so fast and so much if we can’t exactly enjoy the fruits of our labor? Again – not a generally drawn conclusion for everybody, but we’d be able to buy a lot more space with a lot less cash in most instances if we were to move someplace else!

Thirdly, we just can’t deny (however much we might wish to) that us Singaporeans are, more or less, more prone to being ‘shy’ and ‘cautious’ than we are ‘enthusiastic’ and ‘welcoming’. Don’t be mistaken – Singaporeans are definitely not unfriendly- they can be the nicest people when they are actually approached or engaged. However, it is almost like us Singaporeans are just ‘awkward’ in much of our daily interactions. More importantly, we are hesitant about any new changes or behaviors that is considered to be different or not what we are used to. Quite frankly, we can even get a little too paranoid (neurotic?) about anything getting a little too out of line. This can be illustrated in the abundance of laws or rules that we are living with on a daily basis. Consequences are harsh and, in addition (not so much by coincidence), there also happens to be many different ways in which we can get into trouble. Yes, it can’t be denied that our laws have contributed to our low crime rates and helps to keep everything organized and clean. However, this might just start to get a little claustrophobic. It may even breed frustration and lead to harsh consequences.

My next point has some relevance with the point that I had just brought up. Frankly, we Singaporeans just have to deal with an economy that could prove to be overly conventional. One simple example is the fact that occupations, such as those that have to do with dance or art, is not supported or encouraged. Of course, this is common everywhere. However, the limits are increasingly more restrictive here in Singapore. Yes, we might be a small country, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t achieve the same level of success as somebody somewhere else! Furthermore, consider the pressure that our Asian culture puts on us. A majority of Americans and the like do not really feel inclined to take care of their elderly. They possess the mindset that they will be able to fend for themselves in old age without needing too much support from their children. Furthermore, the elderly are usually supported heavily by the government with pensions and benefits, and are more or less able to find ways to survive independently. However, it is our culture to take care of our elderly for as long as they need it. This means that we would not only have to take on the burden and stress that comes with providing for our children and spouse, we would also have to factor in our elderly and the like – even considering the help received from our government. With so many uncertain factors to consider, many youths would not be courageous enough to take on such unstable, high-risk jobs. Therefore, it could be said that the strict economy has deprived some youths of being able to do what they would love to do, which is just a shame. The world needs a variety of different people out there, and giving up on a dream is possibly the worst thing a person can go through.

American TV Series mainly filmed in New York: Gossip Girl

Finally, the next reason I thought of is possibly the biggest reason why youths feel the need to migrate – a mindset cultivated and molded throughout our entire lives. Years of American culture or any other foreign culture have been readily available to us through the media and the like. Such media would probably be biased and might portray their own culture in a more promising, attractive yet undeserved light – knowingly or not, youths might get influenced by such media and may even start to have inaccurate perceptions of success. Suddenly, making it big in their own hometown just isn’t going to cut it – “Everybody knows that success only follows when you move to a big city and plunge yourself into a new, vibrant environment!” Such youths fail to consider the fact that Singapore isn’t just that tiny little dot on the map anymore – sure, we haven’t increased much in terms of size. However, there are sides to Singapore that probably surpass other locations by vast amounts (to be discussed in my next article!). So, if you happen to know somebody who isn’t quite sure where to settle, maybe you could go ahead and help them out! I’m sure you can think of some good reasons yourself, dear reader! J

Well, that’s about all I have come up with thus far. I hope that I haven’t bored you or offended you. Remember – don’t let anybody you know fall prey to the notion that the grass is always greener on the other side! There are bountiful reasons why living in Singapore is great too! (And hopefully my next article can add a few new reasons to your list.)

Can you think of any other reasons why our fellow Singaporeans may feel inclined to migrate to somewhere else? Please share any thoughts you might have :) Email me at OrdinarySGKid@hotmail.com or follow me at @NatKathxo! Thank you for your time!

PM Lee Hsien Loong: With relevance to the Article below

Here’s a short article that’s speaking out to anybody who might be feeling that Migration Bug: http://www.todayonline.com/Singapore/EDC121009-0000169/Spore-at-turning-point,-next-20-years-will-bring-more-changes--PM

Credits: Additional Article by Today. Images- First: chocolatesandvogue.blogspot.com, Second: ecofriend.com, Third: shoppingblog.com, Fourth: ge.sg