Pros & Cons of Listening To A Sad Song After A Break-up

Pros

1) Music-Video Therapy

Let's face it, we've all pretended to be in a sappy, melodramatic music video and least once in our lives. It can be almost therapeutic. You've got all this emotion and nobody to let it out on, so who's really going to give a damn if you crank that (sad song) up a couple of notches, and sob like a devastated prima donna?

The answer is nobody, so listen to that Kelly Clarkson/ Christina Aguilera song, and visualize the perfect murder one more time.

(P.S: A song perfect for such situations.)

2) You Aren't Alone

These songs are written for a reason, right? Nobody could possibly write a hopelessy, heart-wrenchingly, melancholic tune without actually experiencing some kind of pain. And that makes you and the songwriter, like, soul sisters.

And there has to be a reason why the song made it to where it is today (namely, your music player, because you have high standards). It has to be good - It's probably been embraced, and cherished by a million other people besides yourself. 

Somebody somewhere is probably listening to it at this very moment. Maybe somebody's bride ran away at the altar, or their husband cheated on them.

In any case, you aren't going through this alone. All of you are connected somehow - albeit in a decidedly invisible, depressing way. And it aways feels vaguely comforting to know you aren't alone in your pain.

3) A Reminder

When the anger and the surface hatred subsides, you know that exasperating, guilty whim is going to start creeping in again. 

So they hurt you, so what? It's over now, right? Can't things go back to how they were?

Here's where your song is going to come in handy. It's a double-edged sword, but it's necessary. You're going to have to stop trying to make it work for the thousandth time in a row, because honestly - there are limits and you do deserve some remnant of pride.

He or she is poison - you've hoped otherwise enough times - and if the song makes you feel like shit, then great - you're going to have to work in the association somehow if you're ever really going to let him or her go. 

It sucks, really, but the song clearly resonates with you for a reason.

Remember what you learned from the pain, not the story.

Cons

1) Almost Masochistic

Back to the double-edged sword idea. I mean, there are obviously drawbacks to feeling like crap. Association is important, but it can also really kind of suck. Especially when the song seems to come on every time you turn on the radio. 

Repetition might kill it for some people, but not all our brains are wired that way. And that means all we really get at the end of the day is a butt-load of hurt.

2) Mood-Killer

Let's face it, being in a teary, self-directed music video is great and all, but it hardly makes us into particularly social (or tolerable) people in the short-run. 

If you find yourself morphing into a whiny, grumpy hell-hound after every one of your routine cleanings, then you probably need to control their occurrences or your dramatics very, very carefully. 

No use losing a couple of real good friends over some perceived PMS-ing (which is probably what it seems like from their POV).

3) Move On

As the days and weeks go by, the (by then) unhealthy inclination to feel sorry and angry at yourself should be passé. Being mournfully melodramatic (whether justified or not) is an option that does have to be overridden at some point. 

You'd have better people in your life by then, better situations to manage. Situations that need your full focus and attention. And here's where that one iconic sad song is really only going to get you down.

Think of it as a chain on the ankle. You can't move on if you hold on to it, no matter how safe and secure it might feel to you.

There's never an ideal limit to how long pain will stick with you. Sometimes it could take weeks, or months, or maybe forever. But at some point, you need to bury it at the back of your mind, and move on.

To you, who are reading this post, you might be here out of curiosity or good nature, but if you happen to be suffering right now, you should know that you aren't alone. Hang in there and press on!

Thank you for your time.

Credits: 1302.photobucket.com, pandawhale.com, comicvine.com, bullshit-blog.com, weheartit.com, iwantcovers.com, cheezburger.com, beyoncetosashafierce.weekly.com